Dark Black Male, Bi-Polar, No Siblings & No Hope

I am going to have to get use to the fact that I will never have a family of my own nor have any type of legacy, my uncle has made that an impossible possibility. The ONLY crime I m guilty of is being born a much darker hue than 80% of the other family members… The face that my uncle thinks by me being born bumped him off some type of ledge.
My grandparents did for me what my mother was either unwilling or unable to do for her ONLY child. After her divorce from my donor he NEVER looked back and I have anyway thought it was because of me, seems he wanted a daughter which he finally got. So there is no need to ever look back… He killed me a long time ago. I reached out to my donor when my uncle first tried to have me killed by dropping a dime on a dope house and said I did it. Luckily for me the dealer know I was anti police and VERY anti snitch.

I have taken cutting myself back up as a side show hobby. Why? Because The physical pain dulls the mental pain…even if its temporary. Besides I have nothing to offer a women now, I have nothing because I am nothing.